Spotted @ The Single Father’s Blog
As painful as they can be, breakups are something that we all have to go through. Sometimes people just grow apart, and sometimes it just becomes unbearable to deal with the person that you’ve been involved with and the only thing you can do is breakup. It sucks having to tell your friends and family that your girlfriend isn’t around any more because she dumped you.
Usually, before the breakup comes there are some sort of signs that things are about to fall apart. Just so you won’t be surprised when she drops the “I think we should just be friends” hammer on you, I have compiled a list of ways to tell that she’s just not into you any more.
She Doesn’t Contact You Like She Used To
Usually in the early stages of a relationship there is constant contact. Communication by phone calls, text messages, emails, instant messaging usually takes up a great deal of your day when you meet someone new that you really like. As you get closer with your new love interest that constant communication may slow down a little, but you should be talking and communicating regularly throughout the day. But the first sign that something is going wrong usually comes when the amount of communication begins to drop. Instead of talking to each other all day via text messages and email, you may only get one or two messages a day and possibly a phone call. It’s usually hard for women to fake it. If she isn’t feeling a situation, she isn’t going to force herself to talk to you. More than likely she is going to shut down and you are going to have to investigate a little to find out what is bothering her. Sometimes, you may call and after a few minutes of conversation she will find a reason to get off of the phone. If you notice a pattern similar to this, you might want to start packing your bags.
She Avoids Talking About The Future
Women like men who are willing to commit their time to them, and especially men who are able to make plans for long term future commitments. If you start to bring up things like next year’s summer vacation, or where you all are going to spend the next holiday season and she doesn’t show signs of interest or attempt to give any real feedback it means that she doesn’t plan on keeping you around long enough for any of those things to take place.
Lack of effort
Now this is a definite way to gauge where a woman’s mind is. Most women will give their input when it comes to things that you all are going to do as a couple. She will make a point to tell you if there is a romantic resort that she heard about on TV, or a new restaurant that she wants to try, or even a new dish that she wants to cook. As men, we usually go with the flow and give our two cents when asked. But if you notice that she stops making the effort to do things with you, or better yet if she shows no interest in doing things that interest YOU then she has lost interest in the relationship and couldn’t care less about what makes you happy. I am a firm believer that people make time for what truly interested in. If she was interested, she would find a way to make it happen.
Subliminal Tweets and Facebook Posts
Aaahhhhh….The infamous “Sub Tweet”! We’ve all seen it, some of us (self included) have even sent a few sub tweets ourselves. This happens when someone will write posts on social networks about someone without mentioning their name. Some women have become masters at this art. As men we have to see the subliminal posts ans realize that they are just cries for attention. Don’t fall into the trap of sending subliminal replies, because that is only going to dig a deeper hole of non communication. If you see that your lady is sending out tweets about you without actually mentioning your name, just pick up the phone and call her. Don’t let your entire relationship spill out over a social networking site for all of your friends and followers to see. The worst that you can do is reply to a subtweet with a subtweet. Trust me you will spend your whole day scrolling through her timeline trying to figure out if she is talking about you.
Arguing More Often
You used to only argue about silly things like who took up most of the covers in the bed at night, or leaving the cap off of the toothpaste. Now it seems like every little thing you say seems to set her off and vice versa. Sometimes the chemistry that you thought was so awesome in the beginning just isn’t there anymore. The things that used to seem minuscule are now knock down, drag out arguments with no clear winner at the end. You all are just arguing to argue. And once those fights are over, you’re left wondering what you were even arguing about in the first place. When these arguments start happening in public around friends and family, it’s usually time to call it quits.
She Starts To Keep Secrets
Trust is the biggest factor in keeping a relationship together in my opinion. If you can’t trust each other, then there is no use for you to even try to work out a relationship. Without trust you just have two people who are together because it’s convenient. And if you find out that the one person who you love and trust is keeping secrets from you, it’s pretty safe to say that your relationship is doomed if she doesn’t change her behavior. A lot of times the things that are done in the dark will come to light, and that’s when secrets will start to be exposed. Usually when there are secrets there is some form of dishonesty. It can easily become a pattern. She tells you that she was working overtime all week, and you find out that she was actually going to the bar for drinks with her girlfriend every evening. Nope….that’s just not going to work!
Change In Sex Pattern
Everyone’s sex life is different when they are in a relationship. Some folks have sex like rabbits when they first find a new love interest and that tapers off as time goes along, or it stays the same throughout the duration of the relationship. Whatever the frequency of intimacy in your relationship, you should have some idea of what your partners sexual patterns are. If she isn’t the spur of the moment, get it in at the drop of a hat type of gal you’ll be able to tell that from the beginning. But if she has a high sex drive in the beginning, and you notice that her desire to be intimate has diminished then that usually means that she is no longer emotionally connected to the relationship. At this point it’s going to take way more than good sex to get her back. If you want her to stay, you are going to have to show her why you’re the one that she should be with.