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Dear Shena,

“My fiancé currently became incarcerated (he got caught with drugs while been served a summons for an assault against me), just weeks before we were intending on moving to a new apartment and my oldest daughter was to be off for college.  I was left with the task of moving myself and the kids, and my college bound daughter all my own.  Anyway, since my fiancé’s departure my ex has come back into the picture and has proven to be a really big help to me and the children.  He’s helped with finances for my daughter’s college start and help with furnishing the new place and assisting in daycare or where ever he is really needed.  The issue is that my fiancé has repeatedly mentioned how he doesn’t want anyone to know where we now live, of which he isn’t on the lease.  So I’m pondering as to whether just tell him that I don’t want him to come live with us.  It wouldn’t be because I want to get back with my ex, because I don’t, I can just appreciate his help right now, and by my fiancé going to jail at his age is a sign showing me that maybe he isn’t the right person for me anyway.  Also my ex doesn’t know that I am communicating with my fiancé, actually he doesn’t even know that I was engaged at all. .  I guess I need to know how to come clean to both without appearing to have led one on and used the other?”



All right! What do you think she should do? Leave your comments below.