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So the “On the Run” tour hasn’t sold out not one date — and we have a good idea why! Jay Z and Beyonce have been up in our faces ever since Blue was born, and while most people seem to like that, CLEARLY, there are those out there who aren’t feeling it.

Why are there so many tickets left for their tour? Let’s run through some ideas.

It’s too damn expensive.

nene twirl

Carters, what? The rent’s too dam high! One ticket, for the good seats, is $300 damn dollars — $300!! You know what you can get for $300? Something that will last a whole lot longer than two hours, I’ll tell you that much. I mean, how much are you supposed to give over to these folks? I know why they named their tour “On the Run” — because after they rob you for all you got, they’re running with your money!

We already saw them!


Okay, maybe haven’t seen Beyonce, but she just got off of her Mrs. Carter tour earlier this year. How many times can you see one person in concert back-to-back? Personally, I saw Jay Z in concert in 2012, and that was my second time seeing him. You see one Jay concert, honestly, you’ve seen them all. People want to get a chance to miss you before they see you again. I know I didn’t make up the phrase, “absence makes the heart grow fonder.”

Don’t think we forgot about that elevator incident

judge judy

So y’all really gonna release some BS statement about what happened, and, yeahyeahyeah, we get it, y’all are a family and need your private time but c’mon. You want me to give you my hard earned money while y’all act like everything is cool and copasetic onstage? Nope. I want story time during intermission.

We’re just tired of them


Sorry to break it to you, world, but enough already. From Instagram to fights to concerts to surprise albums to inaugurations to documentaries to festivals to blahblahblah. You feel where I’m coming from? I understand it’s all a part of the Carters’ job, but, geesh, we JUST. NEED. A. BREAK. This Bonnie and Clyde concert would be great in 2020 when (we hope) things slow down, but right now, they’re acting like that friend who comes to town and always stays at your house and eats up all your food. Bye!


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4 Reasons The ‘On The Run’ Tour Isn’t Selling Out  was originally published on